I’m not quite sure how to begin this message. In fact I’m not actually sure what to include in it or how to end it!!Kelly and I have been a little quieter on social during the last couple of weeks. We’ve been trying to get our heads and hearts around something that neither of us expected to have to navigate.I’ve not been that well in the last couple of months. All of that has meant numerous tests of every conceivable nature. Following a biopsy of an enlarged lymph node, we got the news 10 days ago that I have Stage 4 mantle cell Lymphoma. It’s pretty fucking aggressive so my consultant was eager to tackle it with the same fury that it is moving through my body. If I didn’t receive treatment asap it would see me gone within 4/5 months. I had my first cycle of chemo a week ago. cycle 2 starts on the 29th dec. It’s likely to be a fairly long road that will include more chemo cycles and a full bone marrow transplant.You may not see me here as much in the coming weeks. Rather than focussing on the world outside of me, I am being called to go within. We are still in shock to be honest. Kelly s my rock and doing everything to prop up our world. I feel totally blessed to have friends and family around us who are showering us in love, support and generosity. Every one of our friends and family who know our news, has shown up for us & for this we are truly grateful.Beautiful Mia continues to light up my world & brings humour & light-heartedness to the situation. I’m sure she will take pleasure in drawing on eyebrows when my hair goes!! Breaking this news to her was one of the hardest moments in my life. I have no great wisdom to offer. I’m not feeling it right now. I just know that our world feels turned inside out. Remember your world can change in a heartbeat. It can spin 180, often when you least expect it. Make everything count. Do shit that matters. I’m a little slow responding to messages. I know some of you have sent personal messages and they will be received with love. Please excuse my slow response or total lack of response. Life feels fairly full, so I’m just taking every breath & step as they come with as much ease & grace. Finding the right words in situations like this is hard. Don’t feel a need to comment. Love can still be felt through silence. I send each of you much love for a festive period that offers you space for nourishment, rest and kindness. Yours,Richard x
